No more small talk with the hairdresser: A lockdown silver-lining list from Winnipeg’s HUNKS

With new restrictions in place and Manitobans forced to stay home, people are missing their regular routines.

But instead of focusing on the things you can’t do, we’ve compiled a list of the things that you can be grateful you no longer have to put up with. 

1. Making awkward small talk with a hairdresser. No, I’m still not caught up on Young Sheldon, Jessica. Please fill me in.

2. Feeling guilty about not using that gym membership I haven’t used for six years. 

3. People who pull out their guitar at a party. Honourable mention to people who try to sing the harmonies for Happy Birthday.

The lockdown means it’s much easier to avoid ‘people whose entire personality is built around hot sauce.’ (HUNKS Comedy)

4. People whose entire personality is built around hot sauce.

5. Making up an excuse to not go to a sketch comedy show, or poetry slam, or improv show, or standup comedy show, or play, or concert, or party, or wedding, or gender reveal party.

6. Living in constant fear of being on a prank show.

7. Doing “the wave” half-heartedly for the fifth time around at a Jets game.

8. People who clap when a plane lands, or people who clap when a movie ends, or people who clap when they get their winter tires put on.

Reduced travel means less chance of encountering ‘that guy’ — the one who claps when a plane lands. (Submitted by HUNKS Comedy)

9. Pretending to like curling just to have an excuse to drink on a Wednesday.

10. People who stand too close to me at the grocery store while I’m buying my super-duper flamin’ hot spicy hot sauce that I need. You probably couldn’t handle it. I talk all about it in my standup comedy act. You should really come to a show sometime.

So the next time you think you miss human interaction, just be thankful you don’t have to go to an escape room with your co-workers.


This column is part of CBC’s Opinion section. For more information about this section, please read this editor’s blog and our FAQ.

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